Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
