i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
