Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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