honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Randomize
