Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I skipped work to stalk him.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Randomize
