just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
