Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize