How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize