what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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