Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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