After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize