I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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