So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
