I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
