how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I would fuck him just for his dog
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize