I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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