garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
soo... how was my night?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
