How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
