absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
