Pants 0. Shit 1.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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