im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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