yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
My boob is missing a layer of skin
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
