I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize