did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
