Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Randomize
