I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
This is the high leading the old right now
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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