Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
