dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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