If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
