Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
