Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
