I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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