Having a random hookup so left but love u
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
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