So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
