Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
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