why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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