so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I am one with the molecules
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
