let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
