I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
