wrigley field is MILF paradise
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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