every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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