school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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