Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize