yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
