I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
