I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I will be naked everywhere
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
