My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize