Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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