i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
