is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
