normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
